Confidence is not something parents can suddenly teach a child when they become a teenager. According to actor Kareena Kapoor Khan, it starts much earlier. Speaking on stage at the Magic ’24 event in Bangkok, Kareena spoke about the importance of giving children confidence from a very young age. She also shared a parenting lesson she learnt from her husband Saif Ali Khan and one that her own father had given her.“Specially, we need to give confidence to our kids. Confidence is actually given at a very small age,” Kareena said. She explained that parents often underestimate how much their reactions matter when children are still young. “When parents see their kids playing, or when they do something in school, we should always say, Saif has told me this that you should always give our son Taimur confidence. ‘You should always tell him, you did so well, WOW, this is so good.’ They feel that in the smallest of the things, that age, the confidence starts growing.”
28 Jul 2026 | 16:22
How do you teach children about money and financial responsibility?
Teach children to own both success and failure
Kareena also connected confidence with independence.
Kareena also made an important point about how parents respond when things do not go their child’s way. “Whether it is a loss or a win, your loss is also yours, and your victory is also yours,” she said. That can be an important lesson for parents of school-going children. In a competitive environment, it is easy for parents to become more invested in marks, trophies and rankings than the child themselves.But a child who is constantly protected from failure may struggle when things eventually do not work out. Instead, parents can help children understand that losing a competition, making a mistake in class or not getting selected for something does not define them. The child can be disappointed, learn from it and try again.
Let children make some decisions
Kareena also connected confidence with independence. “My advice, or parents’ advice, of course, it’s not right or wrong, but you should take your own decisions. I think that is the right time,” she said. This is perhaps the more difficult part of parenting. Parents naturally want to make the right choices for their children. They decide what to eat, what to wear, which activities to join and, later, which subjects to study.But confidence also grows when children get opportunities to make age-appropriate decisions. A five-year-old can choose between two outfits. A seven-year-old can decide which book to read. An older child can plan how they want to complete a school project or decide which extracurricular activity they want to continue.The decision does not have to be important. What matters is that the child experiences the process of choosing, making a mistake and dealing with the result.
What parents can do differently
Kareena Kapoor with her sons Taimur and Jeh.
One practical takeaway from Kareena’s advice is to look beyond marks and achievements when praising children. Instead of only saying, “You came first,” parents can say, “You worked really hard for this. Instead of, “Why did you get only 7 out of 10?” try asking, “Which part did you find difficult?”And when a child makes a decision that does not work, parents do not always need to immediately step in and fix it. Sometimes, asking, “What do you think you should do now?” can teach more than giving the answer.Kareena ended by connecting the advice to her own childhood. “So this advice which my father also gave me, I think that is the right time to give that to my children Taimur and Jeh as well.”Confidence is built long before children have to face the big decisions of adulthood. It grows through everyday encouragement, small choices, honest conversations and the feeling that they can try, fail, learn and try again without losing their parents’ support.
